See No Evil, Hear No Evil

A friend and I were out for coffee at a diner a few weeks ago when the conversation fell upon the concept of subjective evil, or the gray area surrounding morality. A macabre topic for eggs and bacon, no doubt, and my friend noted that the rise of the anti-hero in films and media has been growing in popularity in recent years. The protagonist, in the form of a retired gunslinger or introverted curmudgeon, is forced into the chaotic fray of by some violent circumstance, only to save the world and become a better functioning member of society. This basic plot construct can be found in action flicks, epic fantasy films, and every single Nicholas Cage feature.

A Life Well Lived

Michael "Flathead" Blanchard
1944 - 2012

Michael "Flathead" Blanchard

A Celebration of the life of Michael "Flathead" Blanchard will be held on April 14th, 3 pm 8160 Rosemary St, Commerce City. Weary of reading obituaries noting someone's courageous battle with death, Mike wanted it known that he died as a result of being stubborn, refusing to follow doctors' orders and raising hell for more than six decades. He enjoyed booze, guns, cars and younger women until the day he died.
Mike was born July 1944 in Colorado to Clyde and Ethel Blanchard. A community activist, he is noted for saving the Dr. Justina Ford house from demolition and defending those who could not defend themselves. He was a Republican delegate, life member of the NRA, founder and President of the Dead Cats MC. He loved music.
 
Mike was preceded in death by Clyde and Ethel Blanchard, survived by his beloved sons Mike and Chopper, former wife Jane Transue, brother Stephen Blanchard (Susan), Uncle Don and Aunt Cynthia Blanchard(his favorite); Uncle Dill and Aunt Dot, cousins and nephews, Baba Yaga can kiss his butt. So many of his childhood friends that weren't killed in Vietnam went on to become criminals, prostitutes and/or Democrats. He asks that you stop by and re-tell the stories he can no longer tell. As the Celebration will contain Adult material we respectfully ask that no children under 18 attend.

- The Denver Post, April 12, 2012

Sales - Worth More Than Money

I work in sales.

I think I have discussed the slightly pathetic ramifications of my insignificant role at a major telecommunications provider in previous essays, but in case it was not well known, I work in business sales. I call on a panoply of industries across the Chicagoland area. My clients range from downtown Chicago consulting firms who peer down on the world from steel girded high rises and demand three piece suits and flashy gadgets all the way to blue collar trucking companies who operate out of cigarette-smoke engulfed trailers on the south side, nestled under the jet fumes of Midway airport.

Distorted Reality TV

If you know my personally, you'll know my distaste for reality TV. If you want a basic summation of my disdain, consider the J. M. Barrie inspired sentiments.

Yup. That sums it up.

It's difficult, because so many people I know love these shows. My wife, for instance, is infatuated a show called Cupcake Wars. Luke Burbank, the host of one of my favorite podcasts Too Beautiful Too Live, is all about what he refers to as "his PWP shows". People With Problems. Shows like Intervention, My Strange Addiction, and Hoarders.

As I think further about my irritation with these shows, I realize that it is not all reality TV that wrankles my ire. I've enjoyed episodes of Iron Chef America. I've met and love the work of the folks of American Pickers. It is programs that debase the intelligence and morality of its participants and/or its viewers that truly make me cry myself to sleep.

Take, for instance, the following brain-frapping programs:

The Bachelor
The Bachelorette
Bachelor Pad
Love in the Wild
The Jersey Shore
The Real House Wives of Atlanta
Bridezillas
16 and Pregnant
Teen Mom

I could go on, but just thinking of the snippets of these shows that I've been exposed to has made my brain twitch in ways that would make a neurologist queasy. So on behalf of all my friends who enjoy these shows, I endure. I've sat through entire episodes of Toddlers in Tiaras. But when push comes to shove, I think that the majority of these programs are a drain on television programming, bring down the IQ of the poeple who watch them, and glorify negative attributes of our society.

What started so innocently as Real World and Road Rules has turned into a style of lackadaisical, unscripted fluff that brings to the surface all the crass impropriety that makes me sad to be an American.

So the next time you flip on the TV and see that Kate Plus 8 is on, grab a book instead. Pull out that worn VHS copy of Uncle Buck. Hop online, and see if there's a new post to this blog! Just do yourself a favor, and save the braincells.

Or at least find a reality show that makes you a better person. Watch Extreme Makeover: Home Edition or something.